The hidden Gem in Healing

Raphael Reiter
July 16, 2023

I have recently been researching a new logo as I work on improving my platform for a 2023 launch of a concept around Mind, Body, Heart Spirit - the four foundations of living with a good soul.

During the research, one of the designers in the team came up with an idea around "Kintsugi."

Here are the notes the designer sent me:


"Kintsugi is the Japanese art of putting broken pottery pieces back together with gold — built on the idea that in embracing flaws and imperfections, you can create an even stronger, more beautiful piece of art. Every break is unique, and instead of repairing an item like new, the 400-year-old technique actually highlights the "scars" as a part of the design. Using this as a metaphor for healing ourselves teaches us an important lesson: Sometimes in the process of repairing things that have broken, we create something more unique, beautiful, and resilient."

I loved it. I had to search for images to remind myself of this concept I had read about some time ago.

I took back that concept to one of my 1 on 1 life coaching clients. She was expressing her need to heal so she could return to how things were before a traumatic event. And so I reminded her that going into the past is neither possible nor something she should be aiming at. Instead, because of her hurt, she will grow stronger. That is what is meant by gaining experience.

It is, in fact, in the healing process that you grow stronger.

This is similar to what we discussed in this article on obstacles making us stronger.

Marcus Aurelius, emperor of Rome, said:

"The impediment to action advances actions. What stands in the way becomes the way."

Remember that. Repeat it daily.

Here are a couple of examples that I found good to contemplate.

I come from a musical background and have studied at the Conservatory of Paris. There I witnessed a phenomenon that took me years to absorb. Some students had a natural technique. Nothing was especially hard for them to do. They became good players.

Others had flaws in parts of their technique. Because it didn't come naturally to them, they had to work on them more. The chain of events that happens when you work hard at healing flaws made that they came out months or years later, not as good players, but as great ones.

If you want to work on muscle growth, you will have to do weight lifting exercises that will literarily tear your muscle tissue to heal stronger.

If you want to become a great sailor, you will have to have navigated at least once in a life-threatening storm.

Remember Odysseus? Even if you haven't read Homer at school, you would have heard of him. That is because he was a Hero fighting big scary monsters. You would not have heard of him had he been battling mice in the safety of his farm.

When you are feeling hurt, lost, sad, or anxious - remember that there is a hidden gem somewhere. That hidden gem doesn't appear once you have healed. It appears during the process of healing.

Maybe something really awful happened in your life. As hard as it might seem to comprehend at this very moment, you have the power to make a choice on how this event will shape your destiny.

Here is my last quote for today. That quote is in the template of my daily journal that I read out loud every single morning:

"From the very beginning, make it your practice to say to every harsh impression, 'you are an impression and not at all what you appear to be.' Next, examine and test it by the rules you possess, the first and greatest of which is this—whether it belongs to the things in our control or not in our control, and if the latter, be prepared to respond, 'It is nothing to me.' - Epictetus

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